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The enemy wants you to ruminate so that you do nothing. In order to ruminate, you gotta sit and think. You gotta sit and do nothing. You know, they talk about how anxiety can't hit a moving target, depression can't hit a moving target. I believe in that. I believe in that. Because when you sit down and ruminate over things, it is stopping you from actually being in the action of repentance. What's up, everybody? It's your girl Lish Speaks, and welcome to another episode of my podcast, I'll Just Let Myself In. It's the podcast where we don't wait for some imaginary permission slip or some seat at an imaginary table. We walk through our God-given doors. And today I got a solo episode for you guys. And listen, I got my Bible. I got my Bible with me today because I have been struggling through some things. And as I was in my Bible study, I decided, you know what? If I'm struggling through it, maybe somebody else is too. And I figured it would be something great for us to talk about and something for me to share. The title of today's episode, we're gonna get right into it. I ain't even doing what I'm stepping in, y'all, because we got we got things to talk about. The title of our episode today is Into Your Mindset. And how fitting, because last week we had an episode with Mo, uh, who is a mental health professional, has a podcast called Your Mental Matters. And you know, anytime you are working on something, learning something, the enemy starts attacking you in that very area. And so this week I spent some time in the word, really trying to grapple with my mindset and the things that I need to change within it. And it brought me back to a couple of different things. First off, I realized that I have been dealing with something called rumination. And uh, listen, it's a nation I don't want to be a part of, okay? It is a nation that I don't want to be a citizen in, but currently I'm there, okay? And um, I have been really just thinking about the same thing over and over and over again. And for those of you who don't know what it means to ruminate, it literally means that to think about something over and over and over again. And although it doesn't have to be negative, rumination has a negative connotation. Um, because when you're thinking about something positive, people usually call it meditating, and we'll get there uh later. But rumination uh is when you are thinking about the past, thinking about maybe a mistake that you made, thinking about a situation that you went through that hurt you, that maybe shocked you, maybe grieved you, a loss you took, um opportunity you didn't get, something negative that you find yourself replaying and thinking about over and over and over and over again. And the crazy thing about it for me is that it's more than one thing. If it was just one thing I was ruminating over, then maybe I'd be all right. But there are several themes in my life right now where my thoughts and feelings about these things are really trying to take me under. And so I'm a Christian, and when something is trying to attack me, I attack it, okay, with the with the word of God. And I spent some time just trying to get my mind wrapped around the things of God, the things that God wants me to be focused on, the things that He has put in my mind to think about, and really just trying to ground myself or reground myself, I should say, in scriptures that have helped me over the years. You know, I've been a Christian over 20 years. I became a Christian when I was 14 years old, as many of you who listen to this podcast know. And one of the things that I try to in part to encourage, warn even young people who become Christians about is that your life will change so many times. You will go through so many seasons. And some of the things that you're doing in the beginning of your faith when you're a baby at it won't sustain you. But baby, some of the things will. Sometimes you got to go back to the things you did at first. Sometimes you got to go back to the scriptures you used at first. Sometimes you got to go back to the things that work because they work for a reason. They're fundamental. And the scriptures that I'm gonna share with you guys today are just fundamental scriptures for me. They are the scriptures that have been getting me through since I was a young person. You know, when you go through things as you're aging, sometimes you are so shocked by things as if they are new things. And I literally heard Ayanla Vinzent say this um recently. She was promoting a book on an episode of uh, I believe, Oprah's podcast or some show Oprah has. Oprah got mad shows, but Ayanna was on one of them. And she was talking about the death of her daughter. And this was her second child that she lost. And she said, one of the things that got her through that death is that she had done that before. Didn't make it easier, certainly didn't make it fun, but she said, I did this before. I know how to lose a daughter. And she said, sometimes we go through things and we act like we've never been through it before. You've been through a breakup, you've been through job loss, you've been through, you know, loss of friendships. You've been through these things before. And I realize that some of the things that I am struggling with, overthinking about, and I gotta be careful with what I share because one, some of it I'm not through, right? And some of it I wanna be mindful about how I share it. But the the fact of the matter is, I've been here before. I've been through these things and harder. Okay. And so what did I use to get through those things? The word. What am I gonna use this time? The word. And I'm encouraged and excited to share these things with you because, like I said, if I'm going through it, chances are you may be going through something like this too. One time a mentor said to me, You need to think about what you are thinking about. And I never forgot that line because it sounds simple, but it was revolutionary to me. Think about what you're thinking about. So many times we just allow thoughts to come and go and roam freely through our minds without taking a second to say, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. What am I even thinking about? What am I even entertaining right now? Why am I staying on this so long? Why am I still thinking about this situation? And as I started to think about the things I've been thinking about, I was really convicted that there is a part of me that really struggles to trust God when I feel rejected. It could be an opportunity, it could be a person, it could be me not living up to my own perception or standard that I have for myself. I struggle to trust God in those moments. And then my mind replays things over and over and over again, trying to find understanding, trying to see, okay, so where did I go wrong? What could I have done differently? Did I do that? You know, do I deserve this? Did I not deserve this? All these things going over in my mind. Over. And it's so funny because, you know, as I as I've shared this with certain people in my life, people be like, I would never know this if you didn't tell me that you seem so confident, you seem so this, and you seem so that, baby. I'd be stressed out. I ain't even gonna hold y'all. Sometimes I am confident and I am good and I am sure and secure. And like, listen, it is what it is. I did what I did, I said what I said, I didn't do this, I did do that, whatever. But then there are other times, especially when there are things that are very close to the heart, that I tend to second guess myself, even when I did the right thing spiritually. And I I am growing, I'm learning, I'm coming to terms with in my mind that there is a way to deal with reoccurring thoughts, feelings, and ideas that don't come from the Lord. And there also is a way to deal with reoccurring thoughts and ideas that do. So we're gonna talk about those things a little bit later. But the first scripture that I have been really meditating and going back to is one that I've known since I known words. And it's in Philippians 4. It's one of my favorites because I feel like it really just gives me the blueprint. You know, sometimes you're like thinking about what you're thinking about, right? And you're like, but I can't stop thinking about it. Like, I don't, I don't know how to not think about it. And I think the reason that I love this scripture is because it gives me alternatives, right? So in Philippians 4, verse 8, the Bible says, and I'm reading from the NIV, read from whatever version you want to read from. Because y'all be doing a lot with the versions. Read from the version you want to read from. I got my good old handy dandy. This is an old Bible. This has been around for a long time, okay? This is the version I got stuff in, and I'm gonna read from the NIV. I digress. Philippians 4, verse 8. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things. I love this scripture. I love the scriptures before it. I love the scriptures after, right before it says, do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, with prayer, petition, and thanksgiving, present your request to God. I love this scripture. Then it tells you the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your heart and your minds in Christ Jesus. I love the scripture. I know about heart because I say it to myself all the time. Right after it says, Whatever you've learned or received or heard or seen in me, this is Paul talking to the church and uh Philippi, put it into practice and the peace of God will be with you, right? These are things that give you peace. And I love this scripture because, like I said, sometimes when I'm trying to get my mind off of something, I'm trying to do all these like quick little worldly, and when I say worldly, I don't mean sinful. I just mean things that are not necessarily spiritual, right? Let me put some music on, let me listen to a podcast, let me call my homegirl, let me talk to my husband, let me call my sister. All these things that are not gonna fix the rumination. Because as soon as those things are done, I'm gonna be right back to thinking about the situation. But what will fix it is this whatever is true. Let's just start right there. Let's just start right there. I think that this scripture, when Paul was writing this letter, he started with whatever is true. Because if you start with whatever is true, you don't even have to keep going sometime. Sometimes some of the stuff that we are thinking is just not true. Recently I had a situation, one of the situations that I have ruminated on and worked through. And I'm, you know, I'm I can share about this because I'm pretty much at the end of this, I think. But someone shared something that they felt about me. And because what they said is something that I pride myself on not being, I was ruminating on. Okay, so what made them feel like that? And and not just that they felt like that, because I can take someone coming to me and telling me, hey, I feel like you're this or that. But there was a, there was some behavior before I had this conversation with the person that was really hurtful. And it started to make me second guess my nature, right? And to be fair, there are parts of what the person shared that I'm like, bet, I can work on that. I can work on these things, I can make sure that I'm more mindful of this. But by and large, what the person was trying to say about me or what they how they felt in relationship to me was not true in any of my other relationships. And I'm talking 10, 15 other relationships. And it took me really asking myself, okay, but is this true about you? They feel like they feel this way about you, but is that actually true? And the parts of it that are true, let's take those parts and the other parts, we we gotta go, we gotta go. Because you're not gonna sit here and try to replay every conversation you've ever had with this person or every interaction you've had with this person and why they felt like they could handle you this way. Just starting at whatever's true. Whatever is true. If one person in your life feels like your breath stink, but 15 other people in your life say, girl, your breath, your breath don't ever stink. I'm with you all the time. If your spouse says, Yeah, you're fine, you good, well then to them, your breath stink. But by and large, your breath don't stink. And that's that's a silly example, but these things are the truth. What is actually true? You know, you may be thinking in your mind, okay, I'm just not as smart as other people. You don't know that to be true. But it's true. What is true? Not what do you think or feel, what can actually be proven. I've heard people with multiple degrees, so many accolades get in rooms and feel like I just don't belong here. And I'm thinking, you're more educated than anybody in here. You know what I mean? What are we what are you talking about? But they have convinced themselves of something that is not true. I had to park in this scripture because I realized that I was not thinking of whatever was noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, praiseworthy. I was not thinking about those things. In fact, I was spending so much time on things that I didn't need to think about that I didn't even have time to think about the things I did need to be thinking about. And this is why reading the scripture is so important because it, it, it, if you allow it, it will jar you back into the reality of who you are supposed to be. Listen, I'm not saying that anytime a difficult thought comes up, you just need to run, right? Because how would you grow? Right. I sit, I sit with myself a lot. I sit with my shortcomings a lot. And I happen to have friends who are extremely honest with me. So if I bring something to their attention and I say, hey, this is what happened, and what do you think about this thing? I say, Yeah, I can see that. I can see why your husband would say that. I can see why that person would say that. Here are some things I think you can work on. And they're also gonna tell me, Alicia, you're an amazing person and you're a great friend, and you're a great spouse, and you're a great daughter, and you're you're a great minister. And anything that is making you question that to the point where you can't stop thinking about things is from the enemy. Because that's not what God would want you to do. See, in everything, and you guys have heard me say this. If you listen to this podcast, you've heard me say this more than once. In everything you go through, the enemy wants you to learn something as well. God has a lesson for you, but the enemy has a lesson for you too. And it's up to you to decide which lesson you're gonna learn. Somebody does something to you that you don't like, the enemy wants you to learn. See, that's why you can't trust people. See, that's why I don't tell nobody nothing. That's why I don't got no friends, because people. You see, that's why I don't, I don't, I don't mess with people because that's what the enemy wants you to learn. God may want you to learn how to have some conflict resolution, how to have a conversation, how to advocate for yourself, even. There's a lesson in every single thing. And it's important that you read your word so that you make sure you're learning the lesson that God wants you to learn. What I'm learning from my desire to control my thoughts better, not to ruminate, is that the enemy understands the power of our minds. He understands that if he can get inside our minds, nothing else has to be done. He done got to stop you from doing anything if he can get you to stop yourself. I mean, it is just amazing to me how much I have been or had been allowing myself to be overcome by things that were not even true. Very, very convicting. And my thoughts right now is just to think about such things. You know, it says, whatever is list all the things, and then it says, think about such things. Period. So when you start feeling yourself going here, there and everywhere, overthinking about past relationships. I know I have, you know, people who watch me who have been divorced. You know, you've been divorced for years and years and years, and every now and then you start thinking, thinking about what went wrong, thinking about what happened. Maybe you were cheated on, maybe you were, you know, in a situation where you were being abused and you go back there, and the enemy wants to keep you there because he knows if he can keep you there, he can have you stuck and unable to actually help other people come out. He can have you stuck and feel like you don't deserve the goodness of God. He can have you stuck so that you have lesser of an impact on your children, on your family, on your friends. See, that's all he wants. He wants us stuck. And so I just feel like we have to get to a place where we refuse to stay there. And I don't know what that means for different people. You know, for some people, that's gonna take therapy. For some people, it's gonna take a friend saying snap out of it. I was saying on the episode that I did with Jaleisa Seymour that I have, if you haven't seen it, it's a great episode, go back and watch it. Um, but I was saying that, you know, I have friends who let me talk about the same thing over and over and over again, and they may let me talk about it 50 times, but on time 51, they're gonna say, All right, girl, this is getting a little unhealthy. I literally had a friend say to me recently, girl, girl, that that that whole situation is beneath you. Clock it, because she's right. It's all but it's this whole situation is beneath me. Why are we even talking about this? And it's not even a thing about being arrogant. Some things are actually beneath you. Literally. They're actually beneath you. The the Bible says that he will make your enemies your footstool. So if you don't think nothing is supposed to be beneath you, you ain't in the book. It's important that you really do whatever it takes to get your mind where it needs to be. Another scripture that I really love is right behind this one in the Bible. It's Colossians 3 and verse 1, and it says, Since then you have been raised with Christ, set your heart on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things above, not on earthly things. Ciao, this one, this one hits me on a lot of angles because when it comes to disappointment, you know, of maybe not getting an opportunity or things not working as you want. You know, when you're in business, particularly when you're in in entertainment, as I always share, you know, when you're in entertainment, if you don't get an opportunity, chances are somebody you know got the opportunity. The every industry is very small. Chances are somebody that you know or your one degree of separation from, you follow on Instagram, even if you don't know them personally, they got the opportunity. You know, if something doesn't go through for you, and when you're in entertainment, you're gonna see the product. I think about my friends who act, they have to audition for things and do callbacks. And sometimes they don't get it, but the movie is still gonna come out. The play is still gonna run, the show is still gonna come out, and you gotta see it everywhere, and you gotta see the person who did get it posting it everywhere and all the things. Sometimes they go to set and they stay there for a day or two or three and they act, and then their scenes, maybe more than three, and then their scenes get cut. The movie's still gonna come out. The one that all your friends knew you was going to set the film and you was supposed to be in it, and now your scenes ain't make it. It's hard. It's not easy. You know, 300,000 black women were laid off in 2025. And if I start talking about that more, I'll probably be on somebody's list. So I'm not going to say much more about that. But 300,000 black women were laid off. I'm sure there's somebody listening to this podcast who is a part of that number, and you are feeling rejected, frustrated, upset, not understanding why this had to happen to you in this season, feeling like someone else who may or may not have worked harder than you or longer than you has your position now. And it is difficult. And that's why I love that the scripture says, set your heart on things above. Because it's really hard for our minds to be somewhere our hearts aren't for long. They follow each other. Your heart may get somewhere first and your mind will follow, or your mind may get somewhere first and your heart is not there, but maybe eventually they have to be in the same place. This is why people leave families and do all kinds of crazy things because your heart can't be somewhere that your mind is not for very long. And we have to make sure we're setting our hearts on things above so that our minds can get set on things. Above. Why do I say this in this example? You know, when things don't go your way on earth, it is very difficult to find joy if all of your treasure is within what happens on earth. And I think that that may sound like, you know, kooky to some people, but the truth of the matter is there are parts of what are what's happening in our experience here on earth that is happening to our bodies, but not our souls. The fact of the matter is, if you believe in the salvation that you've received from Jesus Christ and you believe you're going to heaven one day, there is a peace that has to come with that, not just because you're going to heaven, but because you understand that God that is setting up a place for you there is also going to take care of you here. And so God gives us an alternative in his word. If you don't subscribe to this, I don't know what to tell you, but if you're a Christian and you subscribe to this thing, you need to put this scripture into practice. You need to fight, fight for it. Because it ain't gonna come easy to set your mind on things above, not on earthly things. Um again, I want to be very clear. If there's not food on your table, I understand it's very difficult to not think about that, right? I understand that. But I also want you to know that when you start setting your mind on things above and you start praying and you start getting in community and you start relying on God, when I tell you He shows up, He shows up. And so I want to encourage you right now, if it's dark, if you feel frustrated, if you missed an opportunity, if something didn't go the way you wanted it to go, really fight to set your mind on things above. Really fight to set your mind on Christ, who understands and sees all things. See, the beauty of when things don't go your way is that your way ain't the best way. Hello, somebody. Okay? Your best thinking has gotten you into some of your worst situations. Your way is not the best way. So when things don't go my way, you know, I'm not gonna say I don't get disappointed or frustrated at times, but I always have to be checked back into the fact that my way is not the best way. And the person, the being who can see all the things, he can see the full timeline, he knows what is best. So sometimes saying no or not right now, or taking an opportunity away from me, or moving me somewhere, is a part of his greater plan for what is best for my life. And because I believe that, it helps me not to self-sabotage and go off the deep end, you know, when it comes to these things. Another scripture that I really, really have been holding on to these days, and it's it's one of those scriptures that means something different to me now than it did when I was younger. It's a scripture in 2 Corinthians in chapter 10, and it says, For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretense that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ. You know, this scripture when I was younger meant different things, right? When I was single, it meant get your lust in check. Okay, you take every thought captive. So you see a fine man and you know you're going somewhere with it, you take that thought captive, right? And it still means that just because you marry don't mean you don't you don't have lustful moments. But that's not really a struggle of mine these days. I'm only less than after one man. Oh, okay. Um, but in this season of my life, I'm realizing that it really means everything that sets itself up against what God has said is true about you, about his divinity, about his plan, about his church. Because as I age, some of the thoughts I ruminate on in those realms are how is God allowing this to happen? How is this happening right now? Or why is this happening right now? Or I don't feel like I have this thing I need or that thing I need or these relationships or whatever. I can I can go every direction with it. And when you start talking about, you know, demon, like I said, as as I've grown, this scripture means different things to me. You know, when I was in college, this scripture meant, you know, anybody on campus that has, you know, that wants to go back and forth about false doctrine. I wasn't a black Israelite at all, obviously I'm a Christian, but I was I was acting like one, okay? I'll go back and forth with you. I have my scriptures that proved this and that did that and all the things. And that was, you know, we demolish every argument that sets itself up against against the word of God. But for me, now it's the arguments in my head. It's the things that I think about that set themselves up against the knowledge of God. And when I think about taking every thought captive, you know, captivity is not a slow thing. The process of capturing someone, I guess, could be slow, you know, if you plan and execute and being all devious. But the actual capture is quick. When you have to capture something, you gotta do it. Even thinking about capturing a photo, right? You you gotta snap. It's a snapshot. And sometimes I take way too long to take the thought captive. The thought is just chilling. And it's easy to take captive because it's there, it's sitting, right? It ain't running, it's just in my mind, sitting, looming. And I'm taking a long time to say, uh, I'm taking this thought captive and making it obedient to Christ. What does it mean to be obedient to Christ or make a thought obedient to Christ? It means to decide that despite what you want to think, you are going to make yourself think of whatever is true. Whatever Christ has said, whatever Christ has shown you. Because, like I said in the beginning, you've been here before. He's already shown you how to get through some things. And if you haven't been in a situation that you're currently in before, I guarantee you there is somebody around you who has been in a similar situation who can help you. But you gotta learn to make your your thoughts obedient to Christ. This is probably the one of the most difficult scriptures. I ain't gonna hold you, especially because sometime before you even think about what you're thinking about, you done had 15, 20 thoughts before you even stop to actually think about what you're thinking about. You you you've been thinking about this for the last 10, 15 minutes. You on the train or you driving or whatever, you just you just spaced out thinking about the situation, thinking about this heartbreak, thinking about this betrayal, thinking about this disappointment. And by the time you realize that you've been thinking about this for X amount of minutes, you are in an emotional pit. I'm I'm praying and fighting to take my thoughts captive quicker, to take them captive, right? Not to try to cajole them to coming over and to calming down and not to distract them. Because the thing is, I want the thoughts gone. I don't want no distraction, no, no temporary distraction from the thought. I want them out. I want to rebuke them. You know, the ones that are not serving me in the sense that they are helping me to repent or change, because again, there are some thoughts you need to you need to ruminate on and have a response of repentance to them. And there are other thoughts that there's nothing for you to do with them. So you need to make them obedient to Christ. And I love this scripture. You know, if we take our thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ, there is a peace that comes with that. Because when you make something obedient to the Prince of Peace, what else is there? He's going to give you peace. Even if it feels well, you haven't made a decision that that hurts you, but it brought you peace. Yeah. Doesn't mean it won't be hurtful or uncomfortable, but it'll bring you peace. When you make those thoughts obedient to Christ and you say, listen, you will not, you know, one of my favorite lines is the devil is a liar. You know, I walk around my house, oh, I rebuke that. Mm-mm. Not up in here. You know, my husband will laugh at me because it could be something silly or small, but I be dead serious. Oh, the devil is a liar. Not no, no, no. That I will not, that will not happen to us. That will not be our story. That will not be, you know, and I'll do it about any little thing. I don't care. Somebody could be like, oh yeah, no, no, no. I rebuke that, not happening, you know, because I understand that for me, for me, if I even give certain thoughts an inch, they're gonna take a yard. You let something slide, now they're doing the cha-cha. Like I can't even play with it. So I have to be very, very quick about taking my thoughts captive and making them obedient to Christ. Scary thoughts come, faithless thoughts come. If you do struggle with lust, lustful thoughts come, you know, things that are not of God come through your mind. Sometimes you can't even help it. You know, it's like, whoa, where did that come from? And I remember a person in my life telling me one time, you can't always control what comes into your mind, but you can control how long it stays there. You can control how long it stays there. And that really was so helpful to me, specifically in my single years, but even now, because sometimes something just gonna hit you. Something just gonna slap you. Some thought just gonna come across your mind, some feeling just gonna come across your mind, some memory just gonna come across your mind. But you can control how long it stays there if you are present and focused. The Bible tells us to be alert. It says the enemy, the devil, your enemy, roams around like a roaring lion looking for somebody to devour. We gotta be alert even in our mind. What are you thinking about and how can you make it obedient to Christ? Y'all, I know this ain't this is heavy stuff. I know this is not like the most feely good, funny, kikity-key podcast, but y'all got enough of those, y'all. You want you want some of that? Go watch another episode. This episode is for those of us who are really trying to make sure our minds are stayed on him. I really want to encourage you not to negotiate with your lower self, not to negotiate with your carnal self, your worldly self, your simple self. I'm I'm on a health journey and I have been on one for some time. And I've had victories, I've had slumps, I've had all sorts of things. And I don't talk about it a whole lot because it's not something that I want y'all to talk about to me. So I don't want opinions and thoughts and Hager. So I just don't really talk about it a whole lot. But what I will say is, you know, one of the people that's helping me and guiding me, one of the things they say to me is, don't negotiate with your lower self. If you say you're gonna get up and go to the gym, when it's time to go, your lower self is gonna try to get you not to go. The part of you that's lazy, the part of you that's tired, right? A valid thing, the part of you that's sore, the part of you that is emotional that day or hormonal that day is going to try to get you not to go. And the the the where we get caught is that we start negotiating. So you said you was gonna go at seven. The part of yourself that doesn't want you to go, doesn't want the part of yourself that wants to stay the same, because we have a we have an internal desire for things not to change, right? Even if the things are not good, bad, unhealthy, whatever. We have a desire for them to stay the same. The crazy that we know is what I call it. At seven o'clock, and you said you were gonna go to the gym, and now you're negotiating with your lower self, the tired self, the sore self, the self that's, you know, comfortable in that bed, the self that would rather take a couple more minutes to sleep, the self that would rather hit the snooze button. And the second that you start negotiating with that, that self, you usually make the wrong decision. Every now and then you say, no, no, no, I'm gonna go. But if you sit there for too long, if you think about it for too much, y'all know. People who who are on their fitness journey, going to the gym five, six days, you know, if you think about it too long, you ain't going. If you say, Oh, I'll go after work, you most likely ain't going. And it's the same thing with our thoughts about other things. If the Bible says you are loved, don't negotiate with the part of yourself that feels rejected. Don't even negotiate with her or him. The Bible says I'm loved. God says I'm chosen. God says I'm anointed. Done. No negotiating with the part of yourself that is not thinking about things above. No negotiating. You know, there's so many scriptures that I feel help me when it comes to my thoughts. Because here's the thing about ruminating thoughts, right? They lead to anxiety. A lot of times they can lead to depression. A lot of times they can lead to you becoming reclusive from other people. Uh, you start to overthink about everything you do. And I thank God, you know, I don't necessarily struggle with that because I have people in my life who just will not allow it. They're like, uh-uh, girl, no, no. I mean, they're just not having it. My husband being one of them, uh, my two best friends, they just are not having it. My sister, so my mom, my dad, like literally, all the closest people to me are like, girl, no. Um, but I could see, I can see how people become that way because rumination will do that to you. It's the lowest part of who you are playing over and over and over and over in your head. Over time, that has to do something to your self-esteem, has to do something to the way that you think about the world, has to do something with the way that you see the people around you. And I had to catch it because I gotta be honest with you, the situation that I spoke about in the beginning of the podcast, it had me start to look at everybody in my life different for a second. It literally was like for a second. Um, because I'm thinking, man, if this person could do this to me and this person could say this about me, like, then what does this mean for the other people in my life? Like, and I said something to a friend and she was like, uh-uh, don't put me in that. No, no, no, no, no. Like, uh no, like, you know what I mean? Everybody's not like that. Everybody won't do that, everybody won't handle you like that. Don't even start that. And it checked me real quick because I was ready to start closing up. Like, all right, I, you know what I mean? If it's if I'm gonna be a problem to people and people could treat me any kind of way, then I'm just gonna keep keep to myself. And the my friend was like, girl, are you crazy? Like, no, like, you know what I mean? We're not doing that. And I needed that reminder because when you allow yourself to ruminate on what is not true, you start to live in a lie. The lie that you are this thing that you are not, the lie that you aren't this thing that you are. Hello, somebody, right? You start to live in a lie. And so it's so important that you have people in your life to help you see the truth, the scriptures to help you see the truth, community to help you see the truth. It is just of paramount importance that you think about what you're thinking about and make sure that you submit those thoughts to Christ. On the idea of anxiety that can come sometime with rumination, I want to give you some encouragement before before we get out of here. You know, as I said earlier, there are two different reactions you can have to what you're ruminating on. Sometimes you are ruminating on a mistake you made, and it was indeed a mistake. You did something terrible. You did something that you cannot take back. You know, people have lost their families because they did something terrible. They cheated on a spouse, lost it all, and you can't change it. You did it. People have, you know, lost jobs because they lied or they did something and they lost their job and you can't take it back. You did that thing. Even in that, rumination is not healthy. Rumination is not the proper response. Repentance is the proper response. And it is so important that when the enemy, because here's the thing: the enemy wants you to ruminate so that you do nothing. In order to ruminate, you gotta sit and think. You gotta sit and do nothing. You know, they talk about how anxiety can't hit a moving target, depression can't hit a moving target. I believe in that. I believe in that because when you sit down and ruminate over things, it is stopping you from actually being in the action of repentance. If you did something that you cannot take back, you know, I'm talking about cheating and you know, losing a job. You know, listen, millions of people subscribe to Holy Culture. Some of you listen to this, you may have murdered someone. You may have done something that you really for real, for real, cannot take back before you knew Christ or before you these are things that happen. And if you are ruminating but haven't repented, you're doing exactly what the enemy wants you to do. I want to encourage you. If something keeps coming to your mind about something you did and you need to make an apology, you need to change something, you need to fix something, I want to encourage you to do that. But if you have already done that, I want you to do whatever it takes to move on. And I want you to let go of the guilt that the enemy wants you to live in. Some of you have adult children that you didn't do right by when they were kids, and you're trying your best to make amends and do different things with them, and you're you're working on it, right? If you are indeed working on it, I'm not talking about I did the best I could do. No, I'm talking about real work, really, really working on it, really calling out your own faults, really changing your own behavior. You've got to forgive yourself. You must forgive yourself. You know, a large part of rumination, and I know this to be true just with my little trivial situations, is a lack of forgiveness for what you may have done wrong. Because you keep thinking through it and how it could be different or what you could have done instead of saying, Man, I'm human, I may not have handled that situation the best, and I gotta move forward. In order to move forward, I gotta forgive myself. I think about Paul. Paul was killing Christians. That's something to ruminate on when God calls you to now be the foremost voice of Christians for the entire New Testament. If Paul was sitting somewhere ruminating and not forgiving himself for what God had already forgiven him for, where would we be? Where would the New Testament be?

unknown: 41:26

Right?

SPEAKER_01: 41:27

Now God would have used somebody else because he's God. But what I'm saying is we we would not have what we have in the word from Paul. And I don't, I'm not big on the whole forgive yourself thing because Jesus died on the cross to forgive you. Whether or not you forgive yourself is irrelevant. But it is very irrelevant to your salvation, but it's very relevant to your mindset and what you are able to do moving forward. If you are stuck ruminating on a mistake you made, a thing you did, something that you could have, you could have done something that that has affected your health and you are just ruminating on why did I make that mistake? I wish I could take that day back. I wish I never. Listen, the enemy wants you to stay stuck in that moment so that you don't move forward. I'm telling you, this thing is real. God has a plan for our thoughts. It is repentance and moving forward. You know, and if you're ruminating on something that you really, you really didn't do anything, you know, some of you got cheated on and you ruminating on that. And you're ruminating about that. You know, some of you had to do the firing and you're ruminating about that because you really didn't want to let go of that part. You really didn't want to fire that person. You really did want to keep that part in the movie and the powers that be said, no, we gotta cut it. And you're ruminating, you're a guilty soul, you're ruminating on that. You know, if you really did not do anything wrong, in humility, figure out what you can learn from the situation and move on. Don't allow the anxiety that the enemy wants you to feel stop you from becoming who the Lord wants you to become. I'm gonna leave you with a couple of scriptures that I really, really love that help me with my mindset uh when it comes to thinking, anxiety, you know, just really help me to have the mindset I believe Christ wants me to have. The first one is in Isaiah 26. This one really gets me together in like a beautiful way. It helps me to just feel at peace. Isaiah 26 in verse 3, the Bible says, We will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever. For the Lord, the Lord is the rock eternal. You know, that perfect peace we're looking for. Sometimes it's just a matter of trusting God. We don't have to have all the details to trust God. We don't have to understand everything to trust God. Y'all already know my favorite scripture, Proverbs 3 verse. If this is your first time here, you finna hear Proverbs 3 verse 5 a million times if you subscribe to this podcast. Lean not on your own understanding. A lot of my rumination is trying to understand. How a person could do this to me, trying to understand why I didn't get. I remember one time, I'm getting off on the tension, but I remember one time something crazy happened in the church that I was a part of. Somebody did something wild. And I was in leadership at the time. And when you're in leadership, you be knowing about all sorts of situations you wish you didn't know about. But I remember, you know, we had dealt with a situation, me and the uh leader's wife. We had dealt with the situation, and then uh, I guess we were on the ride home or on the phone. I don't remember, but we were talking, and I was like, yo, I really cannot believe so-and-so did so-and-so. And she said to me, Why can't you believe it? Like in with the serious, most serious voice. And I was expecting her to be like, Yeah, I can't believe it either, because it was egregious, the situation. She said, Why can't you believe it? People are sinners, Alicia. You shouldn't be shocked. Why can't you believe it? I never forgot that moment. I never forgot it. Because it is the truth. Sometimes we'll be so, I just can't understand why. I just can't understand how people are sinners. That's how. People are unhealed sometime. People are broken, people have been through difficult things. That's how, you know, and when I think about wanting to find perfect peace, it comes in trusting the Lord, not leaning on my own understanding. So Isaiah 26, verse 3 is one of those scriptures for me. Another scripture is Psalm 94 and verse 19. That scripture just says, When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul. I love that scripture because listen, we're living in a rough time. And again, I try to try to keep this podcast positive. I try not to talk too much politics, try not to talk too much, you know, news. But it's a it's an anxiety-inducing time for a lot of people. A lot of people. And I'm gonna be very honest with you. As a black person, you know, seeing so many other people live in the fear and anxiety that my people have been living in since we've been in this country, it breaks my heart in a different way because you know how you feel like, well, I just I know how to handle this. But seeing people who have really never lived this reality before, it's not a gratifying, justifying feeling to me. Like I've seen people online being like, yeah, well, now they know how it feels. I'm sad. I'm sad that you have to live in this level of horror to leave your house. I'm sad that you have to live in this level of fear day to day, because I understand it well. I understand anxiety very well when it comes to just living day to day. And depending on what side you are, it's politically incorrect to talk about this. I'll talk about that. But the truth of the matter is for a large majority of Americans, the anxiety that they live with every single day can never be handled by some other Americans. And that's just a fact. Holy culture, if you want to cut this out, you can cut it out. It'll be on my channel, though. It's just a fact. Some people are living with a level of anxiety that others could never imagine. And we need consolation. Says when anxiety was great within me, great, you know, sometimes the anxiety within you is going to be great and it's founded. You're struggling, you're trying to figure it out, you don't feel safe. You know, I've spoken to people, and and again, some you know, some ultra-righteous people will say, Well, if you did things the right way, if you, you know, if you were a citizen, the government killed killing citizens. Hello, it's okay for your anxiety to be great, just don't stay that way. Allow him to console you. You know, it says, Your consolation brought joy to my soul. To be able to feel joy in the midst of being anxious about something is a God thing. And if you are in a space of anxiety right now, I want to encourage you that there is an alternative available for you. God's consolation, his joy is available to you. Last two scriptures that I love Joshua 1 9 and then 1 Peter 5 7. We're gonna hit those real quick. In Joshua 1 and verse 9, the Bible says, Have I not commanded you, be strong and courageous, do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. And this one gives me comfort because it tells me, listen, do not be terrified, do not be discouraged. These are all things that rumination will bring you: fear, terror, discouragement. Bible says, the Lord your God is with you. He will be with you wherever you go. Have I not commanded you? I love that. I don't know if it's the Brooklyn of me or what, but it's like, listen, didn't I tell you? Maybe because it feels like my mama talking to me. Have I not commanded you, be strong and courageous? It's hard to be strong and courageous if your mind is not there, but God is providing us a way out. And last but certainly not least, in 1 Peter 5 and verse 7, the Bible says, Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. I love this scripture. You know, I think through the people in my life who care for me, and I don't ever feel like a burden to them, even when I know I'm being a burden. One of my best friends is the mother of a toddler. She's pursuing a master's degree. She commutes for work, she's busy, she serves in her church, all sorts of things. And I will dead text her a whole paragraph, send her a whole four-minute voice note in the middle of the day about my little troubles. Okay? And she does the same. You know why? We know we care for each other. We don't even second guess it. It's like, oh, I didn't want to bother you. I don't ever feel that way with her. I got another best friend, same. Important job, does a whole lot, you know, talks all day with kids, also commutes, has family stuff, relationships, or her own life, obviously. I don't, I don't think twice. We go on that phone and I'm telling her whatever I'm going through, and vice versa, because we care. It's it's how much more with God. He says, cast. When you cast something, it's like you're throwing it. He says, cast your anxieties on him because he cares for you. I want to leave you with that scripture. I don't know what you're going through. I don't know what you're ruminating on, right? I know what I know what's what's trying to make laps in my mind. I don't know what's what's taking laps in your mind, but I want to tell you this: God cares. He knows and he cares. And if you don't take anything else from this episode, I want you to remember that you can cast those thoughts, those ideologies, those, those, those ways you identify yourself that are not true, you can cast that anxiety right on Christ. He can handle it. Lay it at the altar and leave it there. And I hope that that encourages you today. Thanks so much for watching this episode. This has been another episode of I'll Just Let Myself in the podcast. And if this is your first time, I pray that this encourages you, that you'll subscribe, that you'll hit the notification bell, that you'll become a part of our family here. If you're listening on Holy Culture, channel 140 on Sirius XM Radio, Monday nights, 8 p.m. Eastern Standard Time, we thank you for listening there. If you're watching on their YouTube, we thank you for watching there. And if you're watching on my YouTube, we thank you for watching there. Do not forget to subscribe. We would love to see you. Some of you have also asked, how can we help? How can we spread the podcast? How can we make the podcast grow? We think you, you know, some of y'all say, we think you deserve more viewers and better numbers and all the things. I agree. I agree. But the best way for you to do that is one to share this with someone personally. I love when you guys repost things in your stories and on TikTok. But when you send a link to someone directly, someone that you love and know and think can benefit from the conversations we have here, the likelihood of them actually watching and joining, you know, our community is much higher. So I want to encourage you to do that. Another way is to actually go to wherever you listen to podcasts, if you listen on Apple Podcasts or Spotify, and leave us a review. Tell people what you think of the podcast. That's a great way. And another way is to leave comments, to repost your favorite things, to post yourself watching it, to really show people what you like about the podcast. We're growing, uh, we're having a really good time encouraging people and making sure that the messages and the guests that we bring you are of quality and benefit to your life because ultimately we want you to walk through your God-given doors. This is the podcast where we don't wait for an imaginary permission slip or a seat at some imaginary table. We walk through our God-given doors. And this has been another week. I will see you back, same time, same place next week. Peace.