Neiko Flowers: 0:00

I just look back on that day and be like man that one. I can remember that day. That one day changed so many things and, umpteen years later, I can credit that day as the day that God was like no, I sent you this woman to direct you or put you on this right path, and I had no idea what my path was going to be. I didn't have no idea what my path was going to be a lot of paps gonna be.

Lish Speaks: 0:22

I didn't have no idea a lot of paps gonna be.

Neiko Flowers: 0:23

You know, one of the things my wife and I had had to overcome was the fact that when I, when my career started taking off in radio and things started moving and shifting, it's almost like the roles reversed Don't bring no drama my way. Don't bring no drama my way. Don't bring no drama my way. Yeah, I might have a great day.

Lish Speaks: 0:49

Don't bring no drama my way. Don't bring no drama my way. Don't bring no drama my way. Girlish Speaks and I am here with another episode of my podcast. I'll Just Let Myself In. It's the podcast where we don't wait for imaginary permission slips or some seat at an imaginary table. We literally walk through our God-given doors and do the very things that God has empowered us to do. Today I have a guest who is really a legend in our space. A legend in our space. I'm gonna read a little something here that I wrote. Okay, uh, just to introduce you guys. Okay, sit on the couch with me. Today I have a celebrated host, an assistant program director and producer. He's stella award nominated, a gospel hall of famer. He's a father, he's a husband and now he's an author. The book my hurt your hill. The greater the obstacle, the greater the glory. Nico flowers is in the building with me today y'all what's up, man, I'm doing well.

Lish Speaks: 1:56

How are you? I'm doing great. I'm doing great.

Neiko Flowers: 1:58

I'm excited to have you here I'm excited to have you too, yeah man, we've been shot.

Lish Speaks: 2:01

We've been talking on this couch for way longer than we needed to, so we had we had to start saying, okay, wait, let's save this for the podcast exactly but such a wealth of experience, wisdom, knowledge and now vulnerability.

Lish Speaks: 2:14

Yeah, um, you have, and so I am excited because I got to do. Not only did I get to read the book, I got to watch you interview other people, I got to watch some interviews that you've done and I got to be honest and tell you from what I've witnessed, from what I've heard, there's a true sense of love and passion for what you do. It's very clear to me that you believe you're called not just to have great conversations and have fun and bring light to people's lives through your various platforms and through gospel music, but that you have stepped into a place where you feel called to help people heal through your deep vulnerability. So so, thank you.

Neiko Flowers: 2:57

Thank you for having me.

Lish Speaks: 2:58

Thank you for having me.

Neiko Flowers: 2:59

I got to say I closed my eyes while you were saying the introduction and I got emotional just listening to that because it was so, you know, for so many years I didn't see all of the things that people saw in me. So to hear that and to be in a place of acceptance in this new era, yeah of me, which is I was like, oh yeah, okay, I, I have done some things you know what I mean and I have touched some people you know what I mean, but you know that, so I appreciate that.

Neiko Flowers: 3:30

Thank you so much. Yeah, no, I love some things out macaroni, you know, or?

Lish Speaks: 3:34

bridging the gap. Nico's flowers.

Neiko Flowers: 3:36

We can go. You know what I'm saying? We can go.

Lish Speaks: 3:38

Yeah, listen man listen, I, uh, I truly just admire. You know I'm new in this space of media and you know I meet a lot of people, but there's something very special and specific about when I met you. We had a very real conversation just off the rip and it made me curious. I think you know you don't get into some of the spaces that you've gotten into purely because of talent. We know a lot of talented people, you know, I mean in every industry, right, and so people who are well loved, well liked, seem to be able to move in different spaces. I'm always very aware that, oh, this person has something else, it's not just talent, because there's a lot of talented people, you know, and I think there's something else for you, from what I've seen is authenticity. You know what I'm saying.

Lish Speaks: 4:28

So it makes so much sense that you wrote this book, but we're going to get into that in a second. I do have so many questions for you, because I feel like your story and how you got to where you are now started right as a young person, and so you said something about a church that you you grew up in. Yes, um, new hope missionary baptist church, you said, is where gospel took a hold of me and wrapped itself around my heart. Yeah, tell me a little bit about the little boy. Yeah, at that church and, uh, and where are you from? Wilmington.

Lish Speaks: 5:04

Wilmington yeah, okay, tell me a little bit about that part of your life so that is a.

Neiko Flowers: 5:09

When you mentioned the church, I immediately got warm because, that's what it makes me feel.

Neiko Flowers: 5:14

Uh, you know, that church, you know, was the same church that my grandparents helped build and it was the church that you know all my aunties, uncles, you know they went to. So it was a generational church. So by the time we came, it was like this foundation. It was like this family outside of my family, you know what I mean. So it felt like and we were there days out the week, you know what I mean. We were there like two, three days out the week.

Neiko Flowers: 5:40

If it wasn't choir rehearsal, it was, you know, prayer meeting, vacation, bible school, all those things. And I our rehearsal, it was, you know, prayer meeting, vacation, bible school, all those things. And I remember like although you know I have a lot of aunts and a few uncles, but I just remember just feeling like an extended family, like there was like you could check your kids gonna get checked by deacon, evangelist, whomever, because that's the type of relationship we had. And I remember my mom, who was so different from me. Uh, especially now, she was very outgoing. I was not that child at all no, no, no, no.

Neiko Flowers: 6:13

My mom would. She was like, had all the leads on the church choir. She was the one, that's right she was doing all of that like, and so she kind of like, kind of, was pushing me towards that. You know, like I would be at the the um, the choir rehearsal so I would hear all the songs and do all the things, and uh, she used to always be like you you can't be knowing the music you know on the radio and you don't know these songs that's my mother don't, don't get shy, because when you're in the car you're singing all the songs, not, you know this song and?

Neiko Flowers: 6:43

And she pushed me into that and I remember, you know, I think that's when my first love of gospel music came Because my mom really enforced that in me. You know we were listening to music all types of music but it was very clear that you know gospel church was how I was going to be raised, and all of my cousins which I call my, my siblings, because we all grew up as yes uh, like siblings, and so when I think about that, I think of like a warm place you know it's very old school.

Neiko Flowers: 7:12

It's like, it's not like church today yeah, no social media. No social media, I'm talking red carpet pews oh my the water up under the altar like you know, like all that stuff. So robes you don't see robes like that so yeah it was like that. So when I think about it, I think of just this this, this comfort.

Lish Speaks: 7:32

I love that you talked about how you know your childhood, you know, wasn't perfect in terms of like you weren't the richest, and different things like that. But you said my childhood was made up of moments that looking back for like snapshots of something bigger than survival. That resonated with me and I'm going to tell you why. I'm from Bed-Stuy, brooklyn, and I always tell people I'm from old Bed-Stuy, not Bed-Stuy now.

Neiko Flowers: 7:55

You walk through Bed-Stuy. Now it's an oasis.

Lish Speaks: 7:58

I'm from Bed-Stuy in the 90s. Okay, I'm from. You know one block could be tree lined. You know literally 5% was tree lined. You know brownstones. And then Malcolm X Avenue was Chinese restaurants, liquor stores gambling pizza shop my father's best friend at the time one of his best friends owned a barbershop. It was just. It's different.

Lish Speaks: 8:22

Right yeah the barber shop. It was just. It's just different right, different words, um, and when I think about my childhood although, you know, being raised in a single parent home, um, it wasn't the most glamorous I also very much feel like it was more than just survival. There was a beauty, there was a, a protection there was a culture, there was music, there was food yeah you know it was survival, but it wasn't just survival.

Lish Speaks: 8:52

So I love that you wrote that. That in there do you attribute and I'm guessing you would that to your mom mostly yeah yeah yeah, definitely she, she definitely made that a.

Neiko Flowers: 9:03

Thing you know it's so funny. You mentioned the, the, the, the food, the music, because I literally remember like we would alternate houses. Specifically, my house was one of the main houses. My mom will open it up on Sundays at the church. We would have the food, we would have the music, all the, the cousins would be running around. You know, like we would have that interaction and, um, that, yeah, so I, I agree it. It just reminds me of those simple times you know what I mean.

Neiko Flowers: 9:32

Like you mentioned earlier before social media it was just like you were just so focused on who was around you and what y'all was doing? You ain't care nothing about.

Lish Speaks: 9:39

We'd like to go outside, you know what I mean, like we look to do that and so you, you know now is, I don't get that same vibe all the time.

Neiko Flowers: 9:49

but yeah, definitely, for sure, Mom would definitely. She definitely instilled that in me for sure. I love that, I love that.

Lish Speaks: 9:55

It's important that you talked about that because later on the book, when you talk about some of the hurts Right For you to still have the overview of your life, that it wasn't just survival to me shows me how tapped in you are to God's grace, his goodness, his wholeness. Right that hard things could be going on, but he's still a good guy, he's still a good father, you know, and I think that that's such an important it flows throughout the whole book.

Neiko Flowers: 10:21

Yeah.

Lish Speaks: 10:21

That, that grace um you. You don't belabor, but you also don't um neglect yeah it's guys, get the book. It's really good. Now I'm about to get really into this before I do that, all right, I have some questions of my own in terms of this whole radio business.

Neiko Flowers: 10:39

Okay, so you talked about how your wife yeah I love this.

Lish Speaks: 10:43

told you to go to the dentist with her 6.30 in the morning right, You're like I should have known that was crazy, but she was taking you in to shadow someone at your local radio station and that really changed the trajectory of your life.

Neiko Flowers: 10:59

Just tell me a little bit about how that day went no-transcript, and so I think that's probably why I wasn't really clearly thinking straight. She know what she was like okay, whatever, and I just went on.

Neiko Flowers: 11:20

She was like, hey, I got whatever. And I just went on. She was like, hey, I got a dentist appointment. I think it was like 630 in the morning or something like that, and I want you to go with me, okay, whatever. And so I remember waking up that morning and it didn't dawn on me. Y'all Like I'm talking late. We get there and, mind you, the radio station was in the same building as a dentist office, but the dentist office was downstairs and the radio station was up, so I knew there was a dental office there. So I was like, okay, cool. But then I was like it's still dark outside. You know what I'm saying. Like it's still dark, like ain't, no wait, who what dentist?

Lish Speaks: 11:56

office is gonna.

Neiko Flowers: 11:57

Let us walk in here there's still, it ain't no light. So we we got there and then, like when, instead of like going to the right, to the dentist, she kind of like hit a left on me and I'm like well, the dentist right there so what are you going here for?

Neiko Flowers: 12:10

and she, she pushed a little button, they buzzed her and they say coming down. And ironically, when they came down to, the person that came down is actually somebody who grew up in the same hometown as me woman, to North Carolina. So I already was familiar with him and I was like what in the world is going on? And then that's when, on the elevator, he told me, and they told me that, hey, you know, your wife reached out and da, da, da, da, da. And here we are and I'm like what in the world? So it was a shock.

Neiko Flowers: 12:39

It was a shock because, you know, up until that point I had no interest in doing radio. I didn't, I had no it. I was. So I was so stuck on I'm gonna be an actor. I was so stuck on I want to do television, I'm gonna be. I watch the Oscars. Like yeah, that's me. And it wasn't. It was my mother-in-law, my wife, who really was like bro, as much as you love people, as much as you listen to music and you know music, like you know music, like I just would be like yo 1992, like you know, I'm saying, like you know, and just come out with something.

Neiko Flowers: 13:13

They was like now you need to do radio. I was like radio and so that's why she took the initiative and did that. Because, to be honest, I might not be sitting right here in this moment had it not been for my wife which is another testament of she knew me better in the moment that I knew myself yes, you know what I mean. And I just look back on that day like man, that one. I can remember that day like that. One day changed so many things and, umpteen years later, I can credit that day as the day that God was like no, I sent you this, this, this woman, to direct you and put you on this right path, and I had no idea what my path was going to be.

Neiko Flowers: 13:54

I didn't have no idea what my path was going to be. So that was a very cool moment and to this day, those people are still very influential in my life. They're my mentors. I reach out to them when I go back home. You know I get up with them yeah. It's so weird because I started off as an intern and now for them they're like man, like you have, like went way past. Yeah, I remember when you started and now to see you get the awards and the book and all it's crazy.

Lish Speaks: 14:27

so you know, shout out to my wife, man, shout out to your wife, bestie, listen, let me tell you something a man that finds a wife yeah okay, finds a good thing, and I think when I was reading that, I was smiling ear to ear because, um, your relationship with your wife reminds me so much of my relationship with my husband. I'm a big dreamer. My dreams got dreams. My plans got plans.

Lish Speaks: 14:52

You know, so much so that I'm finally starting to get to the point where I'm starting to realize you need to give some stuff away. Some of the dreams God gives you might not be for you to do so. If I have a person in my life who I'm like, I think you'd be, I have this idea. You know what I mean. If you're, if you want to try it, maybe we can go in on it together or something. But I'm starting to finally realize you can't do everything, but I feel like your relationship with your wife reminds me of my relationship with my husband, because you need someone who is can take calculated risks. See, people like us. We'll take the risk.

Neiko Flowers: 15:24

I'll jump off the bridge, risk it all. Jump off the bridge Because in our mind it ain't no way, it ain't going to work.

Lish Speaks: 15:29

There's no way, and their mind is like this could not work, Not because of you, because us.

Neiko Flowers: 15:34

It's like it's going to work because I'm doing all the hard work and I'm putting in the work and I'm hustling.

Lish Speaks: 15:39

You need a spouse that's going to say, hey, it might not work, not because of you. Love you, you're great, but that's life.

Neiko Flowers: 15:45

Yeah.

Lish Speaks: 15:46

So maybe let's have some other thoughts. That's so real.

Neiko Flowers: 15:49

I'm just getting to the point where I appreciate that about her, though, because for so long I used to be like don't be, hating on my dreams. You know what I'm saying. Don't hate on my dreams. Yes, okay, like you know you could, but you know you need to put a little bit more thought into it before you do it. So now I appreciate that, because it's the balance that I need.

Neiko Flowers: 16:10

And as much as I be like yo I'm a big faith jumper Like listen I will be like we're moving to California, we're doing it, I don't know what we're doing when we get there?

Lish Speaks: 16:21

No plan, no plan. God said let's go.

Neiko Flowers: 16:23

You know like and she'd be like whoa, we got kids. What are we going to stay who's?

Lish Speaks: 16:28

insurance Right.

Neiko Flowers: 16:29

Yeah, I'm like we got good benefits here, what are we doing? And so now I appreciate that because I'm like, oh boy, I'm glad I listened to you about that, you know who helped me with that.

Lish Speaks: 16:40

I saw Kev on stage and his wife Melissa on a podcast I think it was Dear Future Wifey and let me tell you they really spoke life into us. We were driving somewhere and we were listening to it and we just both kept laughing because the way that Kevin talked about Melissa was the way that I would talk about my husband, and it's the same. It's like you just don't believe it. You just got to see the vision. It's so funny.

Neiko Flowers: 17:08

You say that because we read that book. Well, I did the audio version.

Lish Speaks: 17:12

My wife read it, but we had conversations. Marry, be hard.

Neiko Flowers: 17:15

Yes, marry be hard and I just met Kevin on stage for the first time, maybe about a month ago, okay, and I got the chance to tell him. I was like, man, listen, your relationship with your wife really was a mirror to me and mine, you know, and my wife was there at the time with me and uh, it was really cool him to say, man, thank you, because I really love their transparency yes, me too, and he said something recently that had me cracking up and I told my wife because I'm a big Chipotle, I love, love.

Lish Speaks: 17:42

Chipotle Me too.

Neiko Flowers: 17:43

And so I said Kev said, if your wife know your Chipotle order, you ain't got to tell her. You better keep that woman in your life. Like it's little things and I was like yeah, Like she know how to make my plate without asking me. Like she know how much this I like you know, so I'm a pretty. As you grow, you like all the things that people be like oh, I want this, that.

Lish Speaks: 18:08

and the third Like listen, I want somebody who know my social security number.

Neiko Flowers: 18:12

You know what I'm saying. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Learn right.

Lish Speaks: 18:15

Seriously, you know it all. That's love. That's love. You know my social, you care.

Neiko Flowers: 18:17

You know what I'm saying?

Lish Speaks: 18:18

Yes, yes, yes, make the doctor's appointments and everything. And this is what I want specifically my female, my women, to understand. This is not a gender thing, this is a gifts thing, this is a strengths thing. Whichever partner has the strengths, the gifts, that's the partner who should be at the forefront of certain things. He's at the forefront of business stuff, because I'm bad at business. You know what I mean for a business stuff because I'm bad at business, you know what I mean.

Lish Speaks: 18:48

It's no mystery that I've been in entertainment in some form or fashion for the last almost 20 years, and it's just after the two years that I've been married that some of y'all are like oh, this year, great, the business wasn't right, I had to get the right spouse, y'all don't know the secret weapon behind me.

Neiko Flowers: 19:02

I'm telling you there's a secret weapon.

Lish Speaks: 19:04

Get the right, y'all know the secret weapon behind me. I'm telling you there's a secret weapon and so when I was reading the book and just seeing you know her forethought. Yeah, she gave the. She doesn't even know and I don't know your wife personally yet, but she gave the world a gift by taking you to that radio station. Yeah, like that's kingdom that's so.

Neiko Flowers: 19:24

I just be I, I just be like I, I don't know y'all. That's kingdom I still be shocked, like sometimes I be like how did we get here? You know like, how did we get here? Because, again, it wasn't my plan Right.

Neiko Flowers: 19:35

But you know, seeing how everything looks now, I tell people often I say all the no's make sense. Now I used to get so frustrated with no's and because I used to kind of be a little bit like well God, I ain't want to be in radio, no way like you know what I'm saying like but now you got me a radio and I want that job and they don't want to give it to me.

Neiko Flowers: 19:56

So what am I doing? And now it's like well, you know you, I got you in here for a reason, it wasn't revealed at the time time. And you know, I truly believe that it's uncovering and it's making more sense now Amazing.

Lish Speaks: 20:11

Listen for those of us who are newly married, right newly in the media space career. When I say those of us, I'm talking about myself. What advice would you give? You can either give that combined for those two categories or separate. But just what advice do you have for people like us, newly married, maybe starting a new career? Um, trying to keep god first, but wanting to genuinely be successful? Like no false humility about you know, I'm just doing this just in case no like yeah we really want to make it happen.

Lish Speaks: 20:42

Be a go-getter like yourself. Like what advice do you have?

Neiko Flowers: 20:44

I would say, you know, and this is being transparent you know, one of the things my wife and I had had to overcome was the fact that when I, when my career, start taking off in radio and things start moving and shifting, it's almost like the roles reverse, like when I was in my place and not knowing who I was going to be. My wife had graduated college, she had got her first big job, she was making the money she was. You know it was. I was like still trying to figure out my life, like, lord, this woman out here doing it, and I'm just like, look, I need to get myself together. You know, and it was that it was when stuff started to shift. You know it was when stuff started to shift.

Neiko Flowers: 21:26

You know it was finding the balance and understanding that we each are going to have our times, you know, like so there's a time for her to support me, there's a time for me to support her, and I always try to remember and and and remind her that although, yes, I am, we're going to this event and you know it may be in my arena, I still want to shine the light on you. You know so. There's plenty of interviews, especially like on red carpets. You know, I tell my wife all the time is like you know, I, I'm going to be there, but I need you to be there, I need you to shine.

Lish Speaks: 21:53

Yeah.

Neiko Flowers: 21:53

You know, this is your moment to as much as in mine, because had it not been for you, I wouldn't be even be in this situation, and so I always try to remember that as much as you support me, I support you as well. So having a person that supports you is so key, because I've seen in so many, so many marriages that the spirit of jealousy yeah can come across. You know what I mean and you know we had to have some moments where it's like, hey, it's just my time. That doesn't mean I don't support you. But so there's times when I'm like behind the scenes and nobody knows my wife is a, she's a choreographer, she's a dancer. So there's times when how is this? How funny God is? She got me in this business. But because of my relationships, she gets the opportunities now, cuz I'm always shopping.

Neiko Flowers: 22:42

My wife you know some of her biggest things and not all of them, but a couple of her biggest ones came because I was in this industry and I was like, hey, my wife does that, yeah, for real and it's so it's. It's it's having somebody who understands the full goal you know our full goal was to be powerful together.

Neiko Flowers: 23:03

Yes, you know what I mean. So just because it's your season to shine doesn't mean that their season's not coming, because it's the same way. You know, she may help me with xyz. I may go home and be like, hey, let me reach out to my artist friend who got a new record out and I think you can do some choreography to this, and I know you're gonna kill it, yeah, and it just boom. So compromise, communication, of course, um, through a lot of therapy, I had to get my communication right. Yes, because you know I wasn't always the easiest person, you know, um, but that that was dealing with some things that I had to overcome and uh, I, yeah. So communication and um, compromising. And you know, as far as career wise it's, you know when you're you could tell like, for me, I can tell when God was like OK, this is where you need to be. You know I, I really wanted to make myself the most authentic person I could be when.

Neiko Flowers: 24:09

I first got into the gospel arena I remember, because I came from R&B and hip-hop, you know, and I remember, man, I was trying to sound like all types of deacons and pastors and my wife would call me. She was like you sound crazy, like you do not have to put a scripture in every other sentence, bro, like it is. But you, you do not have to put a scripture in every other sentence, bro, like it. But you know, I was trying to fit in, yeah, and so I kind of lost myself and she was like no, be you, yes, be you like you.

Neiko Flowers: 24:34

Even your little silly jokes like that's who you are like, do that and so it was being be comfortable, like you have to be your full, like naked self, yeah, like with your best friend, your, your spouse, you know, um, and I will say the biggest thing is you got to be best friends. We just had this conversation, like a couple days ago, my wife and I and it's like man, like we really all been like we really could we like to dance right, because that's how we got to. We used to go dancing years ago and I told I said we ain't going dancing in. Really could we like to dance Right, because that's how we got to. We used to go dancing years ago and I told I said we ain't going dancing in a while.

Neiko Flowers: 25:08

I just want to go out just the two of us and just go dance and we just have such a good time. We get this vibe. You know, we always joke, we always joke.

Neiko Flowers: 25:18

My daughter is so me and my son is kind of switch and we were like, oh, like, oh, my god, we're raising ourselves. So, yeah, definitely compromise, and and for career. You know, just be yourself, because what's for you is for you, and create. Try to create your own lane, and sometimes you don't have to create, it just comes off naturally yeah it just comes off naturally yeah and so, yeah, that's what I would say to that though, love that love that love, yeah, all right, let's get into the book a little bit there are a couple of things that you talked about.

Lish Speaks: 25:48

Okay, um, you talked about infertility yep you talked about. You know um would you call it molestation?

Neiko Flowers: 25:56

yeah, sexual molestation violation yeah um.

Lish Speaks: 26:00

You talked about hardships of eviction man.

Neiko Flowers: 26:04

Repossessions.

Lish Speaks: 26:08

Repossessions, joblessness, trying to find yourself, and you did it all in a very small book.

Neiko Flowers: 26:15

Yeah, and I think that's why people are like bro, like whoa, you did it and you know everybody asking for part two. It's like when you have a first child, like you're going to have another one, like whoa.

Lish Speaks: 26:26

Give us a second. We just did this one. Yeah, I'm like whoo.

Neiko Flowers: 26:29

Let me get over this one.

Lish Speaks: 26:30

I read this book in one sitting.

Neiko Flowers: 26:32

Yeah.

Lish Speaks: 26:33

Because it was that good. It was a page turner, as I was telling you earlier. I picked it know um. I had read the book right right and so I was like, all right, I'm gonna read a little bit, and you know I'll read a little book throughout the week and baby one thing I read. I read through I could not put it down um. You talked about having a sudden loss of a friend as well I feel like you been through so much, but you're so light. How do you do do?

Neiko Flowers: 27:04

that.

Lish Speaks: 27:04

I'm asking for a friend, a personal friend.

Neiko Flowers: 27:08

You know, what's so funny is because people thought I was light before, right, and now, after the book came out, I'd be telling people, like no, I'm literally like now. I feel myself that I'm literally like now, like I feel I feel myself that I'm like. You know that certain situation was um, my best friend. He, he was, you know, I called him my cousin because, we stayed one house apart.

Lish Speaks: 27:34

He said he was the reason you had moved to Charlotte.

Neiko Flowers: 27:36

He is the reason I moved to Charlotte Very impactful man and, um, literally what? Not even a month after I moved there, he was killed in a drive, by shooting, you know, and that was the first time I dealt with death. You know I have grandparents to pass and stuff like that, but you know, like out of the blue, you know, I believe he was 22 at the time, you know, and for somebody to to to just lose their life, like like that, in a way like that, a drive-by shooting, that sounds like stuff that you hear, like in movies. You know, I'm saying so. That was really tough for me because I just felt like I was kind of left out in the world alone, because the person that got me there and I often think, like, had he not persuaded me to move, where would I be? Yeah, you know what I mean and what would I be doing if I was here and so.

Neiko Flowers: 28:24

So that was that was. I can remember that day as clear as day and I remember just being so dark in that time, just being so. You know I talked about it in the book about just abusing alcohol and marijuana and you know, just having my ways, like my wife wasn't in my life at that moment, but she literally came in my life a few months later, you know, and at the time I wasn't trying to be locked down or nothing, so I was just out here just wondering the world, um, and the the light comes from my true light. I will say the true light that I have now comes from being my most authentic self. Uh, understanding my purpose.

Neiko Flowers: 29:03

Yeah, I do believe that God was waiting for me to write this book because of all the things that I prayed for and all the things that I wanted to do in my life, like I had these big goals and dreams. I do believe God's gonna bring in the past. But you know he was like, yeah, but only after you. You don't understand your real purpose until you do something like this Because you're full naked. You out here, naked to the world.

Lish Speaks: 29:29

Right, you said to evolve, you need to reveal. Yeah, and that's what God told me.

Neiko Flowers: 29:34

He said in order to evolve, you have to reveal. Yeah, and I was like I remember when I heard that I was driving down the street and I was like God, how much are we revealing? You know what I'm saying, cause, wait a minute, jesus. You know what I'm saying, like, cause, how much are we, how much are you talking?

Lish Speaks: 29:52

because I was like okay, I can reveal some things yeah, I can reveal my issues with my dad and all that stuff.

Neiko Flowers: 29:57

You know, like when I, when I heard everything, everything you know and you know, I have no. I almost feel like I have no, like dark place in my heart anymore you know what I? Mean like I'm just so, like I'm so ready for god just to be like, thank you. Thank you for doing that now I can. Now I can get you where I need you to be, because the amount of people that are going to be healed yes from my hurt is the the goal?

Neiko Flowers: 30:32

yeah and it's a beautiful place to be. So people have been. It's so crazy that you said the light thing, because so many people have been telling me that lately yeah, literally. Um, somebody told me that just randomly. It's like they was about to leave out the door. They was like hey man, and I want to tell you like your light is done and I'm like yeah, what am I doing? Nothing different, like what? Did I say anything you know? So it's a beautiful place to be, yeah, it is.

Lish Speaks: 30:56

Let's talk about some of the hurt.

Neiko Flowers: 30:57

Yeah.

Lish Speaks: 30:58

From a very young age. Yeah, for a span of about how many years, would you say age.

Neiko Flowers: 31:06

Yeah, um, for a span of about how many years would you say? It was like.

Lish Speaks: 31:08

I would say like, I would say like two, maybe two and a half yeah, yeah, by someone who was a decade or so older than you yeah, yeah um, and you know there was so much in it because you think about especially how we grew up, right the kids were left alone play in the room. Go play in the room. Go play in the room. You know a lot of adults had no idea what was happening at some of these sleepovers and hangouts. And so there was a part where you talked about trying to drown it out. Like this didn't really happen.

Neiko Flowers: 31:38

Maybe that didn't happen.

Lish Speaks: 31:40

And when you came to reality that you were violated, that it was by someone who, by all accounts, should have been protecting you on some level, or at least just being a family to you, what was it like to finally realize I got it?

Neiko Flowers: 32:00

I got to figure this out. It's not going away. You know um it. It just you know.

Neiko Flowers: 32:06

As you get older, you know obviously you become like, okay, this, this isn't right you know, I mean like this isn't right, and I think for me it was more. I started seeing the way that individual would you know it would be like two different people and be like two different people, like in front of family. It'd be like, oh one thing. And then it's like, then it'd be completely different. And I realized that, you know, this wasn't normal. This wasn't normal because I felt like nobody else I at least I didn't think so at the time nobody else was going through anything like this.

Neiko Flowers: 32:41

You know, so to me, I was like, yeah, I don't like this. You know, this is, this is not okay with me. And then I, and then, because my parents and my you know family didn't know, I was like, well, this definitely can't be right, because I'm sure they ain't telling nobody. You know what I mean. And so that was that was the thing where I was like I don't like this, this is not normal. And I got to figure out how to get away with this, because you know, a lot of times, when you are a child and you know somebody's older, you know, one of my biggest things was, yeah, I didn't understand, or I didn't know if, if somebody was going to believe me. You know what I mean, like because I was young, um, I had a lot of cousins, um, and I was just in this place of like yeah if I say something, then it could like snowball yeah like it's gonna break the family apart.

Neiko Flowers: 33:36

It's gonna make people feel like, well, who sighs at who really telling the truth? You know what I mean?

Lish Speaks: 33:41

and I'm like, well, this person is a lot older than me, so they, they're adult yeah, you know, I mean so yeah yeah, and I think you know about so many people in our culture, but in all cultures all around, who are afraid to speak up about the things that have happened to them, whether it be physical abuse, sexual abuse, mental and emotional abuse.

Lish Speaks: 34:04

We're just getting to a space in our culture where, you know, it's kind of celebrated, but it still takes a lot to be so vulnerable and not just be vulnerable with your family and your friends, but be vulnerable with the world. In a book, yeah, how you talked about on an interview that I watched, you said before it came out you had anxiety. Um, because you'll be willing to tell everybody until you have to tell everybody, right?

Lish Speaks: 34:33

yeah but since it's come out, you said you felt such a sense of freedom yeah um, are there days where it's still difficult? Are there conversations that you have to have with family members that are still unpleasant, or is it kind of like listen, it's in the. Are there conversations that you have to have with family members that are still unpleasant, or is it kind of like listen, it's in the book. I ain't talking about it, no more. Read the book.

Neiko Flowers: 34:49

Yeah, no, I definitely have days. I definitely have days where I have to remind myself it's in the weirdest thing, it can be out the blue, I can be in the. I mean it's out now. So you know but yeah, it's definitely days where I had those moments and it's definitely days where I have family members who like reach out to me, family members that I haven't spoke to in years or they'll, they'll DM me on, you know, social media or something like that and they, they would tell me like wow.

Lish Speaks: 35:27

Yeah.

Neiko Flowers: 35:28

And they will tell me information that I didn't know Like, and I think it kind of like made me feel like I did do the right thing, because some of the things that I did heard was kind of like stamping what I said and I was like, oh, and then I realized that I just changed a whole generation yeah like. This is a generation curse, generational curse.

Neiko Flowers: 35:50

That just was broken yeah and that to me was so powerful it is because I was like I did this and even though I put myself in a very vulnerable situation and it had to be the the poster child for this you know the amount of people in my family that have reached out to me. It was like that's your story yeah we're not picking sides, because what you didn't know is xyz. Oh my god, it's making sense now you know, and so that was a very you know so yeah it's.

Neiko Flowers: 36:23

It's one of those things where I'd be like, especially with people who haven't seen me since the book came out.

Lish Speaks: 36:31

Yeah, yeah, yeah, because like the first time I see it like bro Yo like I told you like yeah, I didn't know.

Neiko Flowers: 36:36

Man, it's people who haven't seen me since the book came out, and especially in person, and this is very honest the when my book came out there was groups of people that I was concerned about. Yeah, and one of those groups was my co-workers, because a lot of times, you know, we don't let our co-workers know we, they see us as the person we come in. As that's it. You don't see my home life.

Neiko Flowers: 37:00

You don't see yes, you don't know what my you know my house. Look like you don't see my home life. You don't see. You don't know what my you know my house looked like. You don't know anything like that. But to be that vulnerable with people that you don't even, some people that you don't even consider close.

Lish Speaks: 37:11

Yeah, it's like oh boy.

Neiko Flowers: 37:15

So that was interesting because I've gotten some really great responses from some of my coworkers and, um, I don't know, I just was like it is what it is. Yeah, yeah, it is what it is, and I found in that more people are wanting to explore the side of freedom. You know, I tell people man, y'all ain't living it till you live the way, the feeling, the feeling I feel, you know so.

Lish Speaks: 37:37

I tell everybody that, yeah, yeah, if you haven't already, how do you plan to have this conversation with your children? I did, you did. Yeah, tell me I did so.

Neiko Flowers: 37:48

I had the conversation with my children, and I wanted to do it before the book came out okay you know I didn't want them to hear it from anybody else. You know, of course, me and my wife had a conversation and we agreed that we thought it was the right thing and I wanted them to understand because one of the reasons why I wrote the books, because I wanted to be my full self yeah.

Neiko Flowers: 38:07

I couldn't even be a full father because I was still dealing with the things that I was trying to overcome as a child myself, you know what I'm saying so I was like I can't be the best father for them and I'm still dealing with stuff when I was their age.

Neiko Flowers: 38:25

Yeah, you know what I mean. I was like, okay, gotta have a conversation with them. Now what I did was did try to think about is how I put the story, because you know they're still kids and I didn't want to scare them off anything like that. But we've had conversations with them about, hey, certain people or just family in general we love, we love family however, you know, and it went well.

Neiko Flowers: 38:47

You know, um, it was just a four-person conversation, you know, um, and I told him that, hey, when daddy was this age, you know, some things happened to me that shouldn't have happened to me, and you guys are around the same age, so this is a perfect time that I'm having these conversations with y'all so y'all can understand how we think yeah and I think that was important too, because, whether it was the kids or family members in general, that was another blessing about the book.

Neiko Flowers: 39:16

It was the fact that now people can understand why I acted the way I acted yeah, because I couldn't explain it. Yeah. So when I had those moments of like not trusting family members that I genuinely love, they'd be like yeah, he's so like, he just like. He's very like over your shoulder. He don't really like he trusts you, but he don't trust you or I'll, like you know, snap and be like no, what are?

Lish Speaks: 39:42

what are you doing with my kids?

Neiko Flowers: 39:43

Yeah, they didn't understand, and so now that the book comes out, I think for me that that gets into the light again. This freedom is, like now, my, you know being transparent. My sisters, my wife's sisters, my sister-in-laws now were able to just like. I just spent Easter with them.

Neiko Flowers: 40:03

This is the first time that I was around them since the book and we all we was in Charlotte and we was in all in the same house and I was like in my mind I'm thinking, what is this gonna be like? Yeah, what are they gonna? Ask me a question am I gonna get interviewed about the book?

Lish Speaks: 40:18

you know what I mean like but it was so peaceful.

Neiko Flowers: 40:22

You know, in all transparency, you know I didn't always have the best relationships with one of my, my uh sister-in-laws, and that was because I, I couldn't, I wasn't my best self. You know what I mean. So a lot of things I did, she didn't understand. But now when she, when, now that she read the book, she's like yo, it makes sense there's a grace he's going, he was, he was hurting.

Neiko Flowers: 40:43

Yo, he was going. He went through a lot we didn't know. So that's a beautiful thing, you know that. So there that. So, yeah, the kids, the kids took it. Well, um, eventually I will let them, when they get old enough, read the book, but I'm glad the way I did it yeah, you know because, again, I think our house right now, our house, even our energy in our home, is very like you walk in, it's like it's so fresh.

Neiko Flowers: 41:07

I love it it's so fresh, it's light, it's like we have no secrets yes, you know, and do you know how good it feels to have no secrets like it's just walk around. Just that's how I feel in my marriage yeah, it's like, it's like well, we can talk about anything, let's talk about whatever like so. So now, me and my wife crack. We always cracked up, but now, man, I said it in the book, it's like I knew she was the one. Yeah, but you knew.

Lish Speaks: 41:33

But when?

Neiko Flowers: 41:34

you have somebody that, when you tell them something that heavy and can say I'm riding with you.

Lish Speaks: 41:43

Yeah.

Neiko Flowers: 41:44

What we got to do, what you need from me yeah who I need to go to bat.

Lish Speaks: 41:47

You know well who I need to fuss out like yeah, how we gonna do this, how we gonna move how you want to move, like you know, and that was beautiful yeah and I thought about that because one of the things that when I was getting married you, you know, I was very afraid of worried about was just being fully known. It was terrifying. It still is.

Neiko Flowers: 42:12

No offense it was terrifying.

Lish Speaks: 42:13

I remember being in premarital counseling and even before he proposed and we were just he had moved down.

Neiko Flowers: 42:19

So I knew he was going to marry me.

Lish Speaks: 42:20

Yeah, you know at some point and we would talk about things, things like debt, things like school, things like you know, and I was just telling this man everything and I thought to myself, girl, you don't even know if he's going to marry you, you know, and I remember being afraid to go into certain depths of conversation, but the freedom that I felt I tell you what my husband knows, things about me that no one else knows.

Lish Speaks: 42:43

Not my very best friend, not my parents, not my siblings. There are things and it's, it's, it's such a, it's a safety.

Neiko Flowers: 42:51

It's a beautiful place, it's a very, very. It's like you're living in your own world. You know what I mean, and it's like yo I've been missing this all this time. Like this is nice, nice, yeah, like you know, I'm saying it's like really on some dog, on my dog like it don't matter how many years were y'all married before you told her I couldn't get together or married together, together 18 do you think she always knew something was up, or you think she had no clue? She said she didn't.

Lish Speaks: 43:24

No, she always was concerned about just my overprotect with the kid, that's what I, when I was reading, I said maybe she felt like something, she just didn't know what.

Neiko Flowers: 43:34

Yeah, yeah and I wanted to tell her before the kids came.

Lish Speaks: 43:37

Yeah, but I wasn't in my place, I wasn't healed and well, you also seems like from the book you were probably. You were still trying to tell yourself it wasn't yeah, real or as bad yeah yeah, that big of a deal, yeah, yeah.

Neiko Flowers: 43:49

So yeah, I, yeah, she, she. We were together for a long time. You know I seen, you know I seen both of her parents pass, so I seen her go through a lot of hurt, but she didn't necessarily see me go through a lot of hurt, and so I was still bearing in mind you know what.

Lish Speaks: 44:07

I mean.

Neiko Flowers: 44:08

And so yeah, I think more so than more so than anything. When the kids came. I think it spotlighted it for sure, because I really became. My anxiety went through the roof. Yeah because I was so like especially, you go from no kids, yeah to having two and being a first-time parent. So not only you get that first-time parent like I want to make sure everything's good. You know, whatever we like, we were just winging it.

Lish Speaks: 44:36

Like you know, we got two like.

Neiko Flowers: 44:38

One is one is a lot, two is this you know. So I'm trying to keep it together. And, um, yeah, so I think she, I think that's when it, I think that's when it spiked for her. I think she was like yeah, you you got some trust issues.

Lish Speaks: 44:52

Yeah, yeah, yeah you know what I appreciated from reading what it seemed like happened and you can correct me if I'm wrong it seems like your wife did not for one second make it about her, like you know how sometimes you could tell somebody something like well, why wouldn't you tell me? Yeah, why didn't you tell me why? You know what I mean. And it seems like, at least in the book, yeah, she consoled you, she supported you. Um, maybe, even if you guys did have some subsequent conversations, it never seemed to be about you having not told her. And I think that's important.

Lish Speaks: 45:27

Yeah, because sometimes when you tell somebody, you know you may be a parent, right, and your adult child may be coming to you, as you had to with your mom, yeah, to tell you something that happened. That's very difficult, yeah, and when you make it about the, why didn't you tell me and why didn't you feel like you could talk to me and all that it takes, and all those feelings may be valid, right, right, but it's not about you. It's not about you, and people sometimes don't tell because they already feel a guilt from not having told you. So how important was it that your wife's posture? Yeah, was not that?

Neiko Flowers: 46:02

it's very important and it's so and it's so crazy that you said that, because up until this point that's such a great question I don't think I realized that. But now, looking back, she never made it about her. She never made it about her.

Lish Speaks: 46:17

She never made it about her.

Neiko Flowers: 46:19

It was instantly what you want to do, you know, and that is now. I did have some other family members that.

Lish Speaks: 46:28

That did the whole.

Neiko Flowers: 46:30

Well, I did the best, you know, but she never did that. You know. That was super important, because then again, I think that stamped that. Oh, OK, this is my safe space. Ok, she's not. She's not judging, yeah, she's not, you know asking well, why didn't you tell me sooner? She's like okay, I'm taking all this information, I'm laying it out on the table, All right, so what do we do with this? You know what I mean. That's what it was. So that was super important.

Lish Speaks: 47:01

It made me think immediately she's probably an incredible mom. That's the first thing I'm like, because you know it's hard. I think our generation is doing better yeah but the generation before.

Neiko Flowers: 47:11

Maybe they make everything about them yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what you got from what I just said.

Lish Speaks: 47:17

Right, that's all right okay so I appreciate and it made me because you know god's will, I'll be able to have children one day. It made me feel like that's how I want to be and my children, my spouse, my sister, my brother, my parent, comes to me. I don't ever want to make it about. Why didn't you feel like I could have helped you, I could have been there. Why didn't you tell me? Yeah that's not the clearly.

Neiko Flowers: 47:50

That's not the point. And you're setting up such a great place for your kids just to come and just. You know I joke about my kids because you know I love them. Babies, we have a relationship that is so open. My wife just said last night like that boy, that son of yours, like he is at the age where he's going in my closet, he is like she was like you.

Lish Speaks: 48:09

You know you got the fresh stuff.

Neiko Flowers: 48:10

Right, she was like you know. You know, that's your best friend, right like he looks up to you, so I'm like yo if you wear a certain pair of sneakers now, he want to wear them like it's little things and it's that comfortability you know. So, like a lot of times, my son will walk in our closet like he did it this morning, he walked in our closet grabbed something. He's like Dad, can I wear this? I was like yes, son. He's like thank you.

Neiko Flowers: 48:29

And it's like I always waited for these moments. I waited for the moments of having kids, that you could have, these great, still be a parent but still have those relationships and when you have this open conversation and you feel like there's nothing for my child, there's nothing my kids don't know about me, right? So it's kind of like yeah, ok, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's free, it's life, I love it.

Lish Speaks: 48:48

I love it and you're setting up such a dope legacy for your children, not just by the vulnerability and the honesty of this book, but by your entrepreneurship and who you are Right. So you have things like's flowers, where you want to give people their flowers, and you work at one of the most prestigious stations, praise 1025. Working with your Katelyn Carr. You've interviewed the who's who's of who's of the who's whether through that show or through your own show that you have.

Lish Speaks: 49:23

I think it is so cool for young black children to see their dad and mom run a business, create a brand you know, and be able to pass them some nepotism if they so desire. Right, Because I love that. I can't wait to have a nepo baby. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I want my child to be able to say my mom my, my dad, you know, yeah, and it's just so important for us.

Lish Speaks: 49:48

And you said something that I thought was really cool. You said, after writing this book, you now understand why God gave you this platform. You said that before. You thought it was just to be cool and be funny and have great conversations with people and interview people and, you know, bring a different energy. But you now understand why God gave you this platform, on this platform, while your children are watching, while your wife and you are building this up. Yeah, what are your future goals? What are you feeling like? Okay, this is the next thing that I want them to see us do well, first my kids.

Neiko Flowers: 50:23

They have been. They've seen me do like everything from news. My kids. I tell people the funniest thing.

Lish Speaks: 50:28

My kids when they were like one or one and a half or two, they ran on live TV.

Neiko Flowers: 50:35

That was crazy. So they, they grew up, they've been growing up in it. It's funny because they get to the point now they're so unbothered they be hearing me on, they be hearing my voice on radio. They be like, hey, okay, that's my daddy. But just what the crazy part is they, they, their friends, googled me at school and I was like what in the world? The teacher hit me up like, uh, so yeah, yeah, just in case kids reached out, I was like lordesus I didn't realize they cared because they had got.

Neiko Flowers: 51:04

They were in a phase where they was like so unbothered by it but, um, I I realized that that now that I'm in this space of the book is out and you know, the radio part has happened yeah, I realized that. Okay, god has gotten me here and it wasn't necessarily because I love music, it was because he was setting me up all the time. So it was like, now that I'm here, now that I have this platform and the book is out, this is my real, true purpose. It was to get my hurt and get people to their healing and I think, going forward, I really want to continue that. I really want to continue that I tell people I found my purpose. Yeah, I thought I knew my purpose, but I found my purpose. You know, unfortunately it happened for some bad things happening, but it was able to. It's going to be able to uplift other people. I am working on doing some events for men.

Lish Speaks: 52:00

Yes, I love it doing some events for men.

Neiko Flowers: 52:02

you know specifically for men, people who have been, um, you know, molested or violated, you know, who aren't comfortable with coming forward, or somebody who is also either going through or who has?

Neiko Flowers: 52:17

been through and I really want to touch those people. I really want to help people break that stigma of it's okay, it's okay to talk about it. It's okay to talk about it because once they hear somebody else talking about it that look like them and who had a similar background, or maybe not even had a similar background, but something that's like hey, nico did it and I want to talk about it too.

Neiko Flowers: 52:36

so, yeah, I really want to do like panels, events, yeah, um, I that is heavy on my heart speaking I want, I want to travel, I want to speak. I just want to heal people. Yeah, and that's like it's. It's it people ask me all the time. I just want to heal people, I want to go and hey, if somebody in Dallas said hey we got something that a men's event let's, let's talk. You know is a beautiful place. I also want to continue to do television.

Lish Speaks: 53:07

I have really gotten that back in me, my wife.

Neiko Flowers: 53:09

My wife is like by the bug it is. I am bitten by the bug. Um, I would love to at some point write another one. That's an exclusive, because everybody been asking me yeah, yeah, um, I would love to write another one because you know it's, it's been so much healing that came from it. But, yeah, I would love to travel, be a speaker yeah and and potentially maybe turn the book into a movie or a series.

Lish Speaks: 53:37

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cool thing about the book is you say, um, you know abuse doesn't stop, you know when it ends? Yeah, and I believe that it stops when you reach a point of healing and vulnerability, and that's what this book promotes. Um, the book is about so much more than just the abuse yeah but I'm, you do a great job of not shying away from what happened. You even end with some journal prompts.

Neiko Flowers: 54:09

Yeah, yeah.

Lish Speaks: 54:10

And I love this because a lot of times you read books and they leave you like this heavy and you're like what do I do with this?

Neiko Flowers: 54:15

Yeah.

Lish Speaks: 54:15

But you guys took the care to say let's give these people some tools. Yeah, because that's what happened with me.

Neiko Flowers: 54:21

When you read the book, you know in the book there's the letter. You know the letter and you know the letter. Yes, and the letter would have never happened if I didn't get that myself. You know, my therapist really pushed me to go there because I didn't want to go there.

Neiko Flowers: 54:35

Yes, and that was the start. And and then he gave me some of those same to do's, like, hey, let's, let's work this thing backwards, let's start backwards and work our way, because obviously I can have a conversation with you all day, but if you don't give me any tools or you don't have the means yes, you know then it's kind of like, like you said, you're just sitting with it like, yeah, okay, you know I've been through some stuff too. But what do I do like?

Neiko Flowers: 55:00

should I write a book too well, how do I start a lot of people don't start. And you said something early about the black, the black community. We've been so like, trained, yeah to what goes on in the house stays in the house and to pray about it with no action. And I'm not saying don't pray about it, you should definitely pray about it, but there has to be action?

Neiko Flowers: 55:24

yeah, it has to be, you know. And also we got to break this curse. So hey, listen, I don't care if it's family friend, co-worker, spouse, I don't care who it is if you are going through anything that is making you feel uncomfortable and it's abuse or uh whatever a violation it's okay to talk about. And this is what this is about. It's about breaking down. It's kicking down the door and saying I'm not gonna accept this, yeah, anymore, anymore anymore.

Lish Speaks: 55:55

Uh, you say here on the front of this book the greater the obstacle, the greater the glory. Yeah, what great glory are you experiencing in your life, right? Oh?

Neiko Flowers: 56:04

man, so much I'm excited. I'm so excited for the future, like when I I'm thrilled like this year is I, me and my wife was looking at a calendar for this year and I was like, oh god, what is happening? Yeah, you know, like you know, uh, later on this year I'll be inducted into the gospel hall of fame. You know, I I didn't see that coming at all. I didn't see it coming only because I was so focused on myself.

Neiko Flowers: 56:29

I was still trying to heal myself that I didn't see it coming. Um, yeah, like I'm, I'm excited for all the opportunities. Like I just believe in this season because I was obedient to what God had me to do, and that is write. That book might hurt your heel. God has promised me that he is going to open up the floodgates and he was like, now that you got over that, I was waiting for you to get to there because now you can walk into your true purpose. So I'm excited for all the opportunities. You know I'm looking to there's no limit.

Neiko Flowers: 57:06

There's no limit, there's no limit, like when I tell you it's going to be big, I don't even know. I told my wife the other day. I said I don't know what it is, but god was like it's about to be different yeah, in a great way you know like, and that's what being obedient is. Yeah, you know it's like okay, god, I know this is hard and this is mad uncomfortable.

Lish Speaks: 57:28

Okay, but here we go, I'm about to jump off the cliff.

Neiko Flowers: 57:32

Yeah, you know so and God was like and you're going to be rewarded?

Lish Speaks: 57:35

Yeah, yeah, that parachute is there.

Neiko Flowers: 57:37

The parachute is there. I'm floating like a mug.

Lish Speaks: 57:39

I love it. I love it. We asked a question to end that our show here and it is, in the grand scheme of things, what do you want your legacy to be?

Neiko Flowers: 57:50

Delight, I enjoy positivity. You know, I am really in this space of. I want to see everybody win.

Lish Speaks: 58:02

Yeah.

Neiko Flowers: 58:03

You know, I really get. I feel that from you. I really get excited when I see other people going for theirs. You know what I mean. Like I push People. Call me the purpose pusher. Yeah, Because I really enjoy seeing people live their best life. Because, you know, I grew up in a place of and it's no disrespect, but I grew up in a place where only thing we knew was nine to five. You know, you work that job for 30 something 40 years.

Lish Speaks: 58:33

It's your job for the city. Yeah, that's a good job. Working for the city some good benefits and that's it.

Neiko Flowers: 58:39

That's all we knew. And so to see all the things that I've been able to accomplish I just know that I am not only for my children, which you brought up earlier, which I think is super cool because they get to see their dad and their mom do some amazing things, you know, but to also be an example for family members and, you know, friends and colleagues to be like yo, like he out here doing it, yeah, and to see where I started from yeah and to see, hey, don't it, don't matter where you start, it matter, know, if you have a goal and God has put it in your heart to do run with that.

Neiko Flowers: 59:13

So I really want to be the light I want to be. I want to be somebody to just help people just get to where they need to be. So that is for your TV show which it will happen in jesus name. You know if I have connects? Yeah, if I can be like yo, this is the best interviewer ever like she gonna be, you know like that's, that's what it is like.

Neiko Flowers: 59:41

I just love seeing people win, yeah, and, and not feeling like, just because they win, I can't. Yeah you, of course, because you know that ain't it, that ain't it.

Lish Speaks: 59:52

We've known it's enough room at the table.

Neiko Flowers: 59:53

It's enough room. It's enough room at the table, exactly.

Lish Speaks: 59:55

Nico, thank you for being here.

Neiko Flowers: 59:57

Thank you for having me. Thank you for sharing your story.

Lish Speaks: 59:59

I hope that you're smelling your own flowers in this season of just freedom and peace and light. Yeah, light, yeah um, and you know this already but I will say it to you you are certainly healing, you're a healing agent, yes, in this season, thank you, and I believe that god is using you and he is going to continue to elevate you, because thank you you know of what you've revealed.

Neiko Flowers: 1:00:20

So thank you, man yeah, thank you so much and your energy is amazing thank you.

Lish Speaks: 1:00:24

Thank you for having me on the platform absolutely, and um, yeah, we're gonna do this again oh for sure, let's do it. Let's do it. Tell people where to find you, tell people where to support. You get the book on amazon, yeah, yeah, get the yeah, definitely, you can hit me up on instagram facebook.

Neiko Flowers: 1:00:38

On instagram it's sir nico s-i-r-n-e-i-k-o. On facebook it is nico flowers, my government name, and uh, yeah, the book is on amazon and if you'd like a special copy, uh, you can reach out to me, dm me and I'll make that happen as well.

Lish Speaks: 1:00:52

Nice. Well, I'm getting ready to get my book signed.

Neiko Flowers: 1:00:55

But, nico, thank you so much for being here. Absolutely.

Lish Speaks: 1:00:58

And yeah, we're happy. We're happy to have you back anytime you want, for sure.

Neiko Flowers: 1:01:01

Yes, holy culture Awesome.

Lish Speaks: 1:01:03

Awesome. This has been another episode of. I'll just let myself in with your girlish speaks. We had Nico Flowers here telling us about his amazing book. If you enjoyed this episode, please go ahead and share with a friend If you're catching us on Sirius XM channel 140 at 8 pm Eastern time.

Lish Speaks: 1:01:19

Thank you so much. Lock in with us every single Monday night. If you're catching us on Holy Culture's YouTube, please subscribe and share with a friend If you're catching it on my YouTube, Lish Speaks. Thank you so much for being here and make sure to subscribe there as well. Please tell us how you feel about the podcast. If you're listening on a podcast subscription platform, be sure to write a review, and if you want to send us any letters, any information, any questions that you want us to answer or topics you want us to cover, feel free to send it to speakers at LishSpeakscom. This has been another episode and we'll see y'all same time, same place next week. Peace, I'm a crackdown. Don't bring no drama my way. Don't bring no drama my way. Don't bring no drama my way.